I was at MPH lining up to pay for some books that I bought when I saw this book by Dr Aid Bin Abdullah Al Qarni. I just flipped through a couple of pages and found it interesting and beautifully written. It discusses Happiness from an Islamic perspective. Just had to buy the book. I love what I read in Chapter 5. Again He is telling me to let things be and let people say what they want to say. I just had to read this chapter 5 again and again...this is taken from Chapter 5 of this book :
Those who are ignorant have uttered curses at Allah, the Exalted, the Creator of ill that exists, so what treatment should we, who are full of faults, expect from people. You will always have to face criticism, which in its onslaught is like an interminable war: it shows no sign of ending. As long as you shine, give, produce, and have an effect upon others, then disapproval and condemnation will be your lot in life. Until you escape from people by finding a tunnel in the ground or a ladder leading to the sky, they will not desist from censuring you, from finding fault in your character. For that reason, as long as you are from the denizens of earth, expect to be hurt, to be insulted, and to be criticized.
And here is something you should contemplate: a person who is sitting on the ground does not fall, and people do not kick a dead dog. Therefore their anger toward you can be attributed to you surpassing them in righteousness, knowledge, manners, or wealth. In their eyes you are a transgressor whose wrongs cannot be atoned for unless you abandon your talents and strip yourself of all praiseworthy qualities, so that you become stupid, worthless, and to them, innocuous. This result is exactly what they want for you.
So remain firm and patient when facing their insults and criticism. If you are wounded by their words and let them have an influence over you, you will have realized their hopes for them. Instead, forgive them by showing them the most beautiful of manners. Turn away from them and do not feel distressed by their schemes. Their disapproval of you only increases you in worth and merit.
Verily, you will not be able to silence them, but you will be able to bury their criticisms by turning away from them and dismissing what they have to say.
`Perish in your rage '. (Qur 'an 3: 119)
In fact, you will be able to increase them in their rage by increasing your merits and developing your talents.
If you desire to be accepted by all and loved by all, you desire the unattainable.
Grieve not over criticism from the jealous and the weak-mindedYou will be rewarded if you show forbearance to their criticism and to their impertinent remarks. The more they criticize you, the more you are increased in worth, because only someone who is unaccomplished has no one who is jealous of him, and according to the Arab saying,
"People do not kick a dead dog." One poet said:
"They are jealous of he who has surpassed them; People show him enmity and opposition,
Just like spiteful women, who speak of the fair maiden, with jealousy and malice that she is of a low and base character." Zuhayr said:
"They are jealous of that which he has been blessed with; Allah will not take away from him the cause of their resentment." Another said:
"They will envy my death, what wretchedness is this, Even in my death; I am not spared from their jealousy." Another poet said:
"I complained about the injustice of gossip-mongers, and you will not find,
The honorable and successful person who has escaped from jealousy,
You remain, O' honorable and worthy friend, the victim of it, yet no one begrudges the one who is miserable and wretched." In another poem:
"If a person reaches the sky with his nobleness,
Then his enemies will be the numbers of the stars in the sky, they shoot at him using a bow with every kind of persecution, yet their abuses will never bring them to the level of his nobility."
Prophet Moosa (Moses) asked his Lord to prevent people from abusing him with their tongues. Allah said, "O' Moosa, I have not done so for myself. I have created them and provided for them and they blaspheme and curse me!"
It has been authentically narrated that the Prophet (Blessings and Peace be upon him) said,
"Allah says: `The son of Adam curses me and blasphemes me, and he has no right to do so. As for his cursing me, he curses the time, and I am the time: I alternate the day and night as I please. As for their blaspheming me, they say that I have a wife and a child, and I have neither a wife nor a child. “
You may not be able to prevent people from attacking your honor, but you are able to do well and ultimately, to ignore and turn away from their criticism and scorn. Another poet said:
"I move past the fool who curses me,
And I continue on my previous course saying: he does not refer to me!" And yet another said:
"When the fool speaks, then do not respond to him, for better than to answer him is silence."
Idiots and fools clearly feel insulted by those who shine, those who are noble, and those who display genius.
"If the strengths and good points that I possess,
Were my sins, and then pray tell me, how I can make amends.
“Woe to every slanderer and backbiter who has gathered wealth and counted it. He thinks that this wealth will make him last. Forever! Nay! Verily, he will be thrown into the crushing Fire. (Qur'an 104: 1-4)
A well-known western writer said,
"Do what is right, and then turn your back to every vulgar criticism."
Do not respond to an injurious statement that is made about you. Forbearance buries faults, tolerance is superior, silence conquers the enemy, and forgiveness is honor for which you shall be rewarded. If defamatory remarks are printed about you, know that half of those that read such things quickly forget them while the other half are uninterested in the first place. So do not create further noise and fuss by refuting what has been said. A wise person said,
"People are oblivious of you and me, and are busily striving for their bread. And if one of them is thirsty, he will forget my death and yours." A poet said,
"Do not broadcast your affairs to your sitting companions,
Because they are jealous and will rejoice at your misfortune."
A house that has within it serenity and bread is better than a house that is replete with many kinds of expensive foods, yet is a place of trouble and unrest.
