Happy Anniversary To My Soul Mate, My Mahal Ko

This journal is specially dedicated to my Mahal Ko. A year has passed.  Easily the best year of my life.  Because you were right there next to me.  I wake up happy because you are there by my side - I look at you and wonder how you are mine.   Thanks for choosing me.  for continuing to choose me everyday.  I got the best darn one.  I wonder how that happen?I keep telling myself I must have done one good thing in this world [yes Mahal, you hear me saying this again and again]

Thanks for all those sweet everyday nothings  - they really aren't nothing.  They mean so much to me.   You have made my days so much brighter.  Thanks for including  me in every decision, big or little.  For wanting my happiness above your own.  You really are the most selfless man out there.  Your compassion and thoughtfulness astounds me.  You are always thinking of others.  You are always thinking of me.  You never hold a grudge.  seriously, never.  that might be your best quality.  but it's hard for me to pick. Please never change.  

Marriage to you has given me a sense of calm and peace I did not have a year ago.  Thank you for that.  It looks like you are rubbing off on me.  even just a little, i'll take it.   I also didn't expect to know you the way i do, how close we have become was incomprehensible to me before.  what will it be like 10, 20, 60 years from now?  

I thank God for you every.single.day.

i love you. always.

so much love,

your wife 

                    

A Beautiful Love Story

One day, a young guy and a young girl fell in love.
But the guy came from a poor family. The girl’s parents weren’t too happy.
So the young man decided not only to court the girl but to court her parents as well. In time, the parents saw that he was a good man and was worthy of their daughter’s hand.
But there was another problem: The man was a soldier. Soon, war broke out and he was being sent overseas for a year. The week before he left, the man knelt on his knee and asked his lady love, “Will you marry me?” She wiped a tear, said yes, and they were engaged. They agreed that when he got back in one year, they would get married.
But tragedy struck. A few days after he left, the girl had a major vehicular accident. It was a head-on collision.
When she woke up in the hospital, she saw her father and mother crying. Immediately, she knew there was something wrong.
She later found out that she suffered brain injury. The part of her brain that controlled her face muscles was damaged. Her once lovely face was now disfigured. She cried as she saw herself in the mirror. “Yesterday, I was beautiful. Today, I’m a monster.” Her body was also covered with so many ugly wounds.
Right there and then, she decided to release her fiancé from their promise. She knew he wouldn’t want her anymore. She would forget about him and never see him again.
For one year, the soldier wrote many letters—but she wouldn’t answer. He phoned her many times but she wouldn’t return her calls.
But after one year, the mother walked into her room and announced, “He’s back from the war.”
The girl shouted, “No! Please don’t tell him about me. Don’t tell him I’m here!”
The mother said, “He’s getting married,” and handed her a wedding invitation.
The girl’s heart sank. She knew she still loved him—but she had to forget him now.
With great sadness, she opened the wedding invitation.
And then she saw her name on it!
Confused, she asked, “What is this?”
That was when the young man entered her room with a bouquet of flowers. He knelt beside her and asked, “Will you marry me?”
The girl covered her face with her hands and said, “I’m ugly!”
The man said, “Without your permission, your mother sent me your photos. When I saw your photos, I realized that nothing has changed. You’re still the person I fell in love. You’re still as beautiful as ever. Because I love you!”

My Promise To My Mahal Ko...Love You Always

My Mahal Ko you are my best friend and my love. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tenderest care, through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties for the future.I know that our love is heaven sent and I promise to be here forever and always from this day forward you shall not walk alone.  My heart will be your shelter and my arms will be your home.  As I have given you my hand to hold, I give you my life to keep.

 I will hold your hand as we walk forward together, through sunshine and through rain. I will laugh with you and cry with you through the good times and through the pain. I will share with you all hopes born of our dreams and these things I promise you , because in my heart I have always loved you.

My Very Own Brand for My Very Own Brownie

2003, I baked my very first brownie and it all started just for fun...I remember it was a Sunday morning, thought of making chocolate mud cake but end up baking brownies...
As usual, on Sunday my sibling would come over for makan-makan. When my sister arrived, I asked her to taste my brownies[my very first attempt]...she smiled and said...it's so sedap [it's so yummy]. The week after that, she requested for a tray of brownies...and she suggested that i should start selling it. In 2003, butter and chocolates were cheaper so i started selling it at RM10.00 per pack and only RM40 per tray. But then later the prices for the ingredients increased and i can no longer sell it at RM10.00 per pack.
So i stopped selling it and just forget about the whole thing until recently, my other half  and my sister encouraged me to start selling it again but this time at a higher price of RM16. Last Ramadan just a week before the Eid, I posted on my Facebook if anyone like to order my brownies...it caught me by surprise the response I'd received  and until today I still receive  repeat orders and new orders[by word of mouth] daily. Just last week i helped a group of people from Abu Dhabi who came to Malaysia for recruitment...on the last day, I let them taste my brownies. Eissa the head of HR said "It's the best brownies I ever tasted and i am really interested to franchise it at Abu Dhabi. I thought he was just kidding..and just before he left, he gave me his card and asked me to contact him to discuss on the franchising of my brownies. So today, my other half and i got our own brand and our own sticker for our brownies ...and feeling so very proud of it..Thank you Allah and all those who have given me full trust and support. Below is the sticker that means a lot to me...

 With Allah with me, InsyaAllah things will be ok....

Make Me Strong

And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient,

I know I’m waiting
Waiting for something
Something to happen to me
But this waiting comes with
Trials and challenges
Nothing in life is free
I wish that somehow
You’d tell me out aloud
That on that day I’ll be ok
But we’ll never know cause
That’s not the way it works
Help me find my way

My Lord show me right from wrong

Give me light make me strong
I know the road is long
Make me strong
Sometimes it just gets too much
I feel that I’ve lost touch
I know the road is long
Make me strong

I know I’m waiting
Yearning for something
Something known only to me
This waiting comes with
Trials and challenges
Life is one mystery
I wish that somehow
You’d tell me out aloud
That on that day you’ll forgive me
But we’ll never know cause
That’s not the way it works
I beg for your mercy

My Lord show me right from wrong
Give me light make me strong
I know the road is long
Make me strong
Sometimes it just gets too much
I feel that I’ve lost touch
I know the road is long
Make me strong

A Sacred Conversation- by Yasmin Mogahed

There is a time of night when the whole world transforms. During the day, chaos often takes over our lives. The responsibilities of work, school, and family dominate much of our attention. Other than the time we take for the five daily prayers, it is hard to also take time out to reflect or even relax. Many of us live our lives at such a fast pace, we may not even realize what we’re missing.

But there is a time of night when work ends, traffic sleeps, and silence is the only sound. At that time—while the world around us sleeps—there is One who remains awake and waits for us to call on Him. We are told in the hadith qudsi: “Our Lord descends during the last third of each night to the lower heaven, and says: ‘Is there anyone who calls on Me that I may respond to him? Is there anyone who asks Me that I may give unto him? Is there anyone who requests My Forgiveness that I may forgive him?’” (Bukhari and Muslim)

One can only imagine what would happen if a king were to come to our door, offering to give us anything we want. One would think that any sane person would at least set their alarm for such a meeting. If we were told that at exactly one hour before dawn a check for $10,000,000 would be left at our doorstep, would we not wake up to take it?

Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He) has told us that at this time of night, just before dawn, He will come to His servants. Imagine this. The Lord of the universe has offered us a sacred conversation with Him. That Lord waits for us to come speak with Him, and yet many of us leave Him waiting while we sleep in our beds. Allah (swt) comes to us and asks what we want from Him. The Creator of all things has told us that He will give us whatever we ask.

And yet we sleep.

There will come a day when this veil of deception will be lifted. The Qur’an says: “[It will be said], You were certainly in unmindfulness of this, and We have removed from you your cover, so your sight, this Day, is sharp.” (Qur’an 50:22).

On that Day, we will see the true reality. On that Day, we will realize that two rak`at (units) of prayer were greater than everything in the heavens and the earth. We will realize the priceless check that was left on our doorstep every night as we slept. There will come a day when we would give up everything under the sky just to come back and pray those two rak`at.

There will come a day when we would give up everything we ever loved in this life, everything that preoccupied our hearts and minds, every mirage we ran after, just to have that conversation with Allah. But on that Day, there will be some from whom Allah (swt) will turn away… and forget, as they had once forgotten Him.

The Qur’an says: “He will say, ‘My Lord, why have you raised me blind while I was [once] seeing?’ [Allah] will say, ‘Thus did Our signs come to you, and you forgot them; and thus will you this Day be forgotten.’” (Qur’an, 20:125-126) In Surat al-Mu’minoon, Allah says: “Do not cry out today. Indeed, by Us you will not be helped.” (Qur’an, 23:65)

Can you imagine for a moment what these ayat (verses) are saying? This is not about being forgotten by an old friend or classmate. This is about being forgotten by the Lord of the worlds. Not hellfire. Not boiling water. Not scalded skin. There is no punishment greater than this.

And as there is no punishment greater than this, there is no reward greater than what the Prophet ﷺ describes in the following hadith:

“When those deserving of Paradise would enter Paradise, the Blessed and the Exalted would ask: Do you wish Me to give you anything more? They would say: Hast Thou not brightened our faces? Hast Thou not made us enter Paradise and saved us from Fire? He would lift the veil, and of things given to them nothing would be dearer to them than the sight of their Lord, the Mighty and the Glorious.” [Sahih Muslim]

But one does not need to wait until that Day to know the result of this nighttime meeting with Allah (swt). The truth is, there are no words to describe the overwhelming peace in this life from such a conversation. One can only experience it to know. Its effect on one’s life is immeasurable. When you experience qiyam, the late night prayer the rest of your life transforms. Suddenly, the burdens that once crushed you become light. The problems that were irresolvable become solved. And that closeness to your Creator, which was once unreachable, becomes your only lifeline.

My Baby is Finally coming

90% women/girls would dream of having a luxury car..but I am one of those weirdo who doesn't fancy luxury cars...My dream car is simply a classic mini minor...
Today I received a call from someone. He said the mechanic has started doing the car for me [changing the engine, fixing it's body and will repaint the way i want it - red body, 2 white stripes, black roof top and original wooden steering wheels ..and soon..very very soon...my baby mini is coming to me...
I am all so excited waiting for my little baby to arrive...Thank you so much Allah...You have never stop being extremely kind to me despite at times i had been a little naughty and at times i missed my 5 times prayers[not that i am proud of it..but it's the truth]. I feel so very very bless despite my sickness...I am trying my very best to be your good humble servant...Love you very much oh Allah

The 10 Most Misconception About Islam

Misconception # 1: Violence and Terrorism is the Muslim Creed

Credit: BigStockPhoto.com

Islam and Muslims have become synonymous with terms like terrorism, extremism and fundamentalism. The involvement of some so-called Muslims in the acts of terrorism in the past few decades does not justify the labeling of a whole faith and its people as terrorists. Nobody called Timothy McVeigh a Christian terrorist after the Oklahoma bombing in the 90’s, neither is the IRA labeled as a Christian terrorist group, so why is it that when a Muslim does something wrong it is the fault of his religion?

Apparently, logical arguments do not carry any weight in this debate, which is fueled by sensationalism and vested interests at the highest levels of governments. Citing verses of the Qur’an out of the context is the favorite tactic of the proponents of this misconception. There are several verses in the Qur’an that clearly state the opposite of this misconception. For example, “Fight in the cause of God against those who fight you, but do not transgress limits. God does not love transgressors.” (Qur’an 2:190). Another verse says, “If they seek peace, then seek you peace.” (Qur’an 8:61)

Misconception #2: Jihad Means Killing Non-Muslims

If opposition to Islam can be summarized today in one word, it is ‘Jihad’; the all-inclusive term for Islam bashing. Disregarding its true meaning and historical perspective, jihad is decisively equated with the violence that has been perpetrated in the last few decades in the name of Islam by individuals. There are several forms of Jihad; an armed struggle which may involve killing the enemy is ‘Qital’, which is considered by most non-Muslims to be the only form of Jihad. However, according to Islam, one of the most important types of ‘Jihad’ is ‘Jihad bil nafs’ (struggle against the self), every other struggle stems out of this. Jihad bil nafs involves constantly struggling to overcome and control our animal desires.

Misconception #3: Women are Oppressed in Islam

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Saving Muslim women from the ‘tyranny’ of Islam is one of the favorite rallying cries of the people who consider Islam an evil force. Just like many other misdeeds wrongly attributed to Islam rather than to the individuals who commit them, unfair treatment of women is also considered to be the Islamic way of treating women. Setting aside the malicious propaganda, the reason behind this misconception is probably the fact that Islamic teachings about the role, responsibilities, status and treatment of women are judged according to the western practices and beliefs. If anything, Islam liberated the women in Arabia by giving them rights that were unheard of at that time in most nations. The stereotype of veil wearing, home-bound Muslim woman is used to argue that women are oppressed. However, this viewpoint is completely devoid of the knowledge of the status and rights of Muslim women. If we look into how other major religions look at women, we will find surprising revelations. In the New Testament, St. Paul declares, “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I don’t permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.” In contrast, this is what Qur’an has to say, “Whoever works righteousness, man or woman, and has faith, verily to him/her we will give a new life that is good and pure, and we will bestow on such their reward according to the best of their actions.” (16:97)

The right to hold property is considered to be fundamental for human beings, yet no major religion other than Islam actually allowed women to have property. Not only this but Muslim women have full control of their property and their husbands have no share in it.

Misconception #4: Muslims don’t Believe in Jesus

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Many Christians are made to believe that Jesus (peace be upon him) and other prophets are not considered by Muslims as God’s messengers. A cursory reading of Qur’an or other Islamic literature shows that Muslims remember all of the prophets mentioned in the Christian and Judaic scriptures with great respect and reverence. Jesus has been mentioned in Qur’an in several places such as “O Mary, God gives you good news of a word from Him whose name shall be the Messiah, Jesus son of Mary, honored in this world and the Hereafter, and one of those brought near to God. He shall speak to the people from his cradle and in maturity, and shall be of the righteous.”(Qur’an chapter 3)

Misconception #5: Propagation of Islam is the result of Force

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This misconception may be the result of making wrong inferences from the early Islamic history about the expansion of the Muslim state up to the time of Caliph Umar Farooq. The Muslim state indeed spread very quickly in the early years, but the conversion to Islam was never forced upon the people of the conquered territories. If anything, the Qur’an instructs Muslims to deal with them in a kind and just manner “God forbids you not, with regards to those who fight you not for [your] faith nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them; for God loveth those who are just.” (Qur’an 60:8). The most clear-cut statement against conversion by force or coercion comes straight from the Qur’an, “There is no compulsion (or coercion) in the religion (Islam)” (2:256)

The comments of T.W. Arnold on this matter are evidence of the folly of this misconception “… of any organized attempt to force the acceptance of Islam on the non-Muslim population, or of any systematic persecution intended to stamp out the Christian religion, we hear nothing. Had the caliphs chosen to adopt either course of action, they might have swept away Christianity as easily as Ferdinand and Isabella drove Islam out of Spain ….So that the very survival of these Churches to the present day is a strong proof of the generally tolerant attitude of the Mohammedan governments towards them.”

Another historian De lacey O’Leary also negates this myth, “History makes it clear however, that the legend of fanatical Muslims sweeping through the world and forcing Islam at the point of the sword upon conquered races is one of the most fantastically absurd myths that historians have ever repeated.”

Furthermore, it must be pointed out that Muslims ruled and fully controlled India for 800 years and Egypt for even longer than that. Yet the vast majority of the population in India remains Hindu till today, and a small minority of Coptic Christians remains in Egypt today. If Muslims practiced forced conversions there is no way such communities could have survived for over a millennium.

Misconception #6: Islam is Intolerant of Other Religions

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Religious intolerance is high on the charge-sheet against Islam and Muslims. Many non-Muslims believe that Islam does not tolerate other religions and it instructs Muslims to kill all the infidels. Equating the actions of a handful of bad apples with the teachings of Islam about people of other faiths is a grave injustice. There are numerous examples throughout Islamic history that clearly show the extent of religious tolerance in Islam. What could better exemplify it than the verses from the Qur’an and ahadith of Muhammad (pbuh).

“There is no compulsion (or coercion) in the religion (Islam)” (2:256)

“Beware! Whoever is cruel and hard on a non-Muslim minority, or curtails their rights, or burdens them with more than they can bear, or takes anything from them against their free will; I (Prophet Muhammad) will complain against the person on the Day of Judgment.” (Sunnan Abu Dawud)

Misconception #7: Muslims are Savages with no Regard for Culture and Civilization

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Many texts portray Muslims as uncivilized and barbaric people but nothing could be further from the truth. Even a cursory glance at history proves otherwise. War is one instance where showing no mercy is considered to be a tactic. Islam, on the other hand, does not allow Muslim armies to mutilate the dead, kill children or elderly, destroy crops, trees, livestock etc., demolish buildings, harm civilians and break agreements/pacts. With clear rules of engagement like these for war, it would be grossly unfair to call Muslims barbaric.

The influence and contributions of Muslims towards culture and science are widely known and acknowledged by scholars. “It is highly probable that but for the Arabs, modern European civilization would never have arisen at all; it is absolutely certain that but for them, it would not have assumed that character which has enabled it to transcend all previous phases of evolution,” Robert Briffault, a social anthropologist.

Misconception #8: Islam was founded by Muhammad (peace be upon him)

Despite an abundance of literature on Islam, there are some who believe that Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) founded Islam and Muslims worship him as well as Allah. Any serious attempt to learn about Islam will right away debunk this misconception. In order to enter into the fold of Islam, a person must pronounce the Shahadah (the testimony of faith); the meaning of which is

“I bear witness that there is no God worthy of worship except Allah and I bear witness that Muhammad (SAW) is His slave and messenger”..

Also in chapter 33 of the Qur’an it is stated, “O Prophet, verily We have sent you as a witness and a bearer of glad tidings and a warner and as one who invites unto God by His leave and as an illuminating lamp.”

Misconception #9: At least Four Wives for Muslim Men

Some aspects of Muslim culture have been universally accepted as the defacto standard such as four wives for Muslim men. Most westerners believe that every Muslim has a ‘harem’ with at least four wives. First of all, it should be clearly understood that it is an option not a compulsion. There are social and cultural reasons behind the practice of polygamy which can only be understood with the knowledge of Arab society at that time. There are strict conditions that must be met such as equal treatment of the wives. It surprises me that the people who make a huge fuss about polygamy in Islam, have no issue with promiscuity in western cultures where extra-marital relationships and children born out of wedlock are accepted with open arms.

Misconception #10: The Crescent and Star is the Symbol of Islam

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It is a common misconception even among Muslims that the crescent moon and star is the official symbol of Islam. However, in the days of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) Muslims did not have a symbol and they used solid-colored flags. In fact, the crescent was adopted as a symbol by the Turks during Ottoman Empire’s conquest of Constantinople.

Specially dedicated to domestic violence victims

I was requested to write this entry by this particular person. She is one of my very special friend. Woke up at 3.45am this morning when i received a text message from her. This is what she wrote me." Salam Ellie, don't know to whom should I talk to....I had a fight with my hubby. He hit me badly on my face. After more than 10 times he hit me, I fought back. I managed to punch his face, his throat and kicked his balls. I bit his arm. Please don't call me now. I just wanna let someone know, so if anything worst happen, someone knows about it. I am in my toilet now looking at my battered face."...
We exchanged text messages after that just to make sure she was alright. She stopped sending me text message when she heard he husband came back again. Most women are too afraid to report the domestic violence. Some are afraid to go through the divorce, some stays simply because of their children.
Many asked" Why did it happen?" "What did 'I" do to cause it? Was there any domestic violence prevention that could have been done? "why did he do this ?" Many women asked these same questions. Sometimes there are absolutely NO "logical" reasons why things happen. Sometimes there are logical reasons. But none of them make us physically, emotionally, or mentally feel any better after they happened.
Was this the only time? Well, I would love to tell you it was. But that wouldn't be the truth. And the truth is why we are all here, right? To find the truth and seek our own solutions to get out.Were there red flags? In reflection, "Heck, yes!" To me any man who hits women or even children are simply COWARD. Why chose to hit on the weaker gender..why not choose their own gender?

Just a flashback of what my ex boyfriend used to do to me whenever i wasn't flying during my MAS days:

I can hear it now… the screaming…. the crying… begging him to stop hitting me … He punches me in my face.. kicks me down to the ground.. Im begging for mercy… He leans down “Sssh……Ill kill you” He dares me to scream… He grabs me by my hair… drags me on the floor. Grabs the cigarette, took a few of out the packet , lit them… ((Please Allah, take me now)) and then… The thunder rolls, I snap back to reality and wipe the tears from my eyes…
At one time I was admitted 18 days at Taipei Taiwan General Hospital for internal bleeding due to the kick and punches I received. So to this close friend of mine, stay strong, and i truly understand the feeling of being hit, kick and punch by a man.

This poem was written for a lady who lost her life at the hand of her boyfriend. I would like to dedicate to all the women who suffer domestic violence.

As I sit here and cry

With bruised and battered eyes

I wonder what did I do

to make you hit me this time

I cooked your food just the way

you like

And I cleaned the house, there’s not

a speck of dust in sight

May it was my makeup or my hair

Or the choice of clothes I chose to wear

I don’t know maybe its just me

It seems nothing I do makes you happy

I cut off my friends and family to prove my love

But it does not seem to be enough

I continue to believe that things will change

and in your promises to never hit me again

But deep down I know you will never change

So I sit here and continue to cry

As I try to find a way to hide

my bruised and battered eyes

I can never thank Allah enough...I am the luckiest woman on the earth because I have the love of the most amazing man....

I am the luckiest woman on the earth because I have the love of the most amazing man. He is so kind , caring, giving, and compassionate. He is always there for me to talk through my rough spots, he is always there to encourage me and make me feel like I matter. He is the most patient man I have EVER known. He makes me laugh and smile every day. I count the seconds, the minute , the hours till I can call him. I love to hear him say " Hey baby" , hear the excitement in his voice , that tells me he's just as happy to hear me. I love that we can talk about ANYTHING, we share our hopes and dreams. With him I feel safe TO dream and hope. I have NEVER loved another as I love him. He is my "other" half, the final piece that when we come together we are WHOLE. We balance each other. What I cannot find within myself he shows me, what he cannot realize on his own I am able open his eyes to. What we share is NOT the average love, it's a closeness a bond very few have. I will NEVER take him or our love for granted. So I am the luckiest woman on this earth because I have the love of this amazingly beautiful sexy man.

Baby , know the first day of my life began the day I became yours. I LOVE YOU

The Voice Within

Young girl don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall
Young girl it's alright
Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly
When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means
Chorus:
When there's no one else, look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength that will guide your way
You'll learn to begin to trust the voice within
Young girl don't hide
You'll never change if you just run away
Young girl just hold tight
Soon you're gonna see your brighter day
Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed
It's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
When you're lost outside look inside to your soul

Chorus
When there's no one else, look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength that will guide your way
You'll learn to begin to trust the voice within
Life is a journey
It can take you anywhere you choose to go
As long as you're learning
You'll find all you'll ever need to know
(be strong)
You'll break it
(hold on)
You'll make it
(be strong, hold on)
Just don't forsake it because
No one can tell you what you can't do
No one can stop you, you know that
I'm talking to you
Young girl don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall...

Fu8king Perfect

Once upon a time I was all in this video...This song brings me to tears every time i hear it because so many of us need to hear this. Parents, Husbands, wives, children, friends please let your loved ones know they are loved.....

DREAMS....

We all have dreams...We all want to believe deep down in our souls that we have special gift,that we can make a difference, that we can touch others in a special way, and that we can make the world a better place.At one time in our lives, we all had a vision for the quality of life that we desire and deserve. Yet, for many of us, those dreams have become so shrouded in the frustrations and routines of daily life that we no longer even make an effort to accomplish them.For far too many, the dream has dissipated - and with it, so has the will to shape our destinies. Many have lost the sense of certainty that creates the winner edge. My life's quest has been restore the dream and make it real, to get each of us to remember and use the unlimited power that lies sleeping within us all.

The Past Is Gone Forever....

The past is just memories. I hear people say they would like to change so many things in their past.Guess what folks,there is absolutely NO way you can change your past.It's over,gone and never to come back again.Let it go. Do not look back. Keep going forward.Live your live in here and now. Forget it. You cannot on no way no how ever change ur past. I am sorry to tell you that but it's trus. There are no machines to take you back, no magics spell will correct your past mistakes and no genie is going to appear and gran you the wish of changing your past.

By brooding over the past and it tragedies, one exhibits a form of insanity- a kind of sickness taht destroys resolve to live for the present moment. Those who have a firm purpose have filed away and forgotten occurrences of the past, which will never again see light, since they occupy such a dark place in the recesses of the mind. Episodes of the past are finished with; sadness cannot retrieve them, melancholy cannot make things right, and depression will neverbring the past back to life. This is because the past is non - existent.

Do not live in the nightmares of former times or under the shade of what you have missed. Save yourself from the ghostly apparition of the past.Do you think that you can return teh sun to its place of rising, the baby to its mother's womb, milk to the udder, or tears to the eye? By contantly dwelling on the past and its happenings, you place yourself in a very frightful and tragic state of mind.

Reading too much into the past is a waste of the present.When Allah mentioned the affairs of the present.When Allah mentioned the affairs of the previous nations, He the Exalted, said:

"That was a nation who has passed away" - (Qur'an 2 : 134)

TRUE FRIENDSHIP

Two inseparable friends, Sam and Jason, met with an accident on their way to Boston City. The following morning, Jason woke up blind and Sam was still unconscious. Dr. Berkeley was standing at his bedside looking at his health chart and medications with a thoughtful expression on his face. When he saw Sam awake, he beamed at him and asked." How are you feeling today Sam?" Sam tried to put up a brave face and smiled back saying, "absolutely wonderful Doctor. I am very grateful for all that you have done for me. "Dr Berkeley was moved at Sam's deed. All that he could say was, "You are a very brave man Sam and God will make it up to you in one way or another". While he was moving on to the next patient, Sam called back at him almost pleading, "promise me you won't tell Jason anything".
"You know I won't do that. Trust me." and walked away.
"Thank you " whispered Sam. He smiled and looked up in prayer " I hope I live up to your ideas...please give me the strength to be able to go through this..Amen"

Months later when Jason had recuperated considerably, he stopped hanging around with Sam. He felt discouraged and embarrassed to spend time with a disabled person like Sam.

Sam was lonely and disheartened ,since he didn't have any body else other than Jason to count on. Things went from bad to worse. And one day Sam died in despair. When Jason was called on his burial, he found a letter waiting for him. Dr Berkeley gave it to him with an expressionless face and said" This is for you Jason. Sam had asked me to give it to you when he was gone".

In the letter he had said: " Dear Jason, I have kept my promise in the end to lend you my eyes if anything had happened to them. Now there is nothing more that I can ask from God, than the fact ,that will see the world through my eyes. You will always be my best friend........Sam".

When he had finished reading Dr. Berkeley said " I had promised Sam to keep his sacrifice he made a secret from you. But now I wish I didn't stick it Because I don't think It was worthy it" .
All that was left for Jason while he stood there was tears of regret and memories of Sam for the rest of his life .

Lesson of the story: No matter what If we make a friend, we should stick by him till the end. Life is meaningless without a friend.

Someone To Love Me

Inside of this girl who pretends to be me.
Beneath of this heart is a girl no one sees.
lonely and frightened she lives in my mind.
longing for love for the love she can't find.
Nobody knows me, no one can see.
Nobody knows me, knows what i feel.
All that i wanted, all that i need
Is some one to love me, to love me, to love me for meeeeeee.

Under this mask is a place where she hides
Under this smile, this soft dreamy eyes
Somewhere beneath what the world wants to see,
Inside of this girl who pretends to be me.
Beneath of this heart is a girl no one sees.
lonely and frightened she lives in my mind.
longing for love for the love she can't find.
Nobody knows me, no one can see.
Nobody knows me, knows what i feel.
All that i wanted, all that i need
Is some one to love me, to love me, to love me for meeeeeee.

KNow the Real Me...

When I first heard this song...it's like Mariah was singing about me..All my life people that know me thought they knew me inside and outside but the fact is, i have always been misjudged based on what they on the surface.

You look at me and see the girl
Who lives inside the golden world
But don't believe
That's all there is to see
You'll never know the real me

She smiles through a thousand tears
And harbors adolescent fears
She dreams of all
That she can never be
She wades in insecurity
And hides herself inside of me

Don't say she takes it all for granted
I'm well aware of all I have
Don't think that I am disenchanted
Please understand

It seems as though I've always been
Somebody outside looking in
Well here I am for all of them to bleed
But they can't take my heart from me
And they can't bring me to my knees
They'll never know the real me

I LOVE YOU

Does absence make the heart grow fonder? Maybe so...!!I am writing this I LOVE YOU LETTER while Nz is away from me for a week. In it I share with my sweetheart the reason I love him.

My Beloved Nz,
I love you. Just writing that puts a smile on my face. YOu put a smile on my face.

I love you because of your sweetness, your kindness, your tenderness and your thoughtfulness.

I love you because you are MY DEAR FRIEND and LOVING COMPANION. You smile at my silly jokes, my "muka merajuk" and my youthful spirit.

I love you because I have a longing to be close to you and you long to be close to me. I love snuggling and cuddling with you on the swing at my porch(which we call "OUR SPECIAL PLACE") every night till early in the morning. I love to be near you. I love holding your hand on a walk during the day and holding your hands across the table at "Kayu" restaurant at night.
I love you because you listen to me as I share the small triumphs or struggles of the day.

I love you because in moments of friction between us, you hear me out. Even when you don't agree with me, you listen with a longing to understand me.I love you because you respect me. You enjoy my attentiveness and appreciate my efforts to romance you. You appreciate my generosity to yourself and my generosity towards others.

I love you, sayunk!

Ellie

With Your Love I ALREADY AM RICH beyond my dreams

One day Ellie was wandering in the forest thinking and missing her beloved Nz. Satan was looking down upon the earth looking for a soul to torment. He saw Ellie wandering alone in the forest and he flew down to meet her.

Satan said: "Why Ellie, I have been looking for you".

A startled Ellie asked: "What do you want?"

Satan said: "What do I want?Ellie, please, I have a wonderful offer for YOU!"

Ellie replied : "Thanks. But I am not interested".

Satan said: "Why Ellie, you haven't what i have to offer. I could make you very wealthy ".

Ellie said: "You don't say".

Satan said: "Yes, I will make you quite wealthy. I will make you rich beyond your dreams".

Ellie replied: "Excuse me if I sound suspicious, but there wouldn't happen to be a catch?".

Satan said: "Ellie, I am offering you so much!! All you have to do is give up on Nz's love for you and I will make you rich beyond your dreams".

Ellie smiled.

Satan saw the smile and said : See Ellie, I knew you will like my offer".

Ellie's smile broaden and she replied: You don't understand. Satan, I am not interested in your offer. With Nz's love, I ALREADY AM rich beyond my dreams".

Letter to My Soul Mate From Minah Ayat Power

My Dearest Sweetheart

Time is inconsequential as the words are always present in my soul, so the transposition from heart to paper is swift. The emotions come from the deepest core of my being...the place where no one but you can walk. There is a gazebo, replete with trellised adornments upon which Topaz roses grow. A weeping-willow, ancient and wise with silent offerings of love and life, whispers softly its secrets to you as the wafting breeze strokes the strings of its mellow harp.

I was lost upon a sea of changes, winds and waves, searching...hoping in silent and profound prayer that somehow my redemption would appear. You came into my life and I realized that it was not something new that I had hoped for, but something as old as time itself, created at the beginning of all things...the absent part of my soul...the essence of my soul...You.

The day the kind fates smiled upon me and their soft, caressing winds blew my battered self upon the warm shores of your heart, I was born anew...whole once again. A someone, not just a broken shard. You have restored me. My heart, like the harp can sing again...can taste the flavors of emotion and touch intimately the tenderness within.

You, My Love...are the life within me. The breath of Spring and rejuvenation. the strength that carries me through the wilderness on my way home to you.

I Love You more deeply than I can express.

Your loving wife,

Ellie