Hold On....Be Strong

I have been assigned by my boss to handle this project and its not just a project but a huge project and it's million Ringgit project. I am all excited at the same time only God knows how much I am scared and worried. Not because of anything but I am given million ringgit worth project to handle but I am not given a team to work with. Yup no team. Just me, myself and I.
And I really do not want to screw up with this project coz if I do, I am putting my neck on a chopping board. I am doing the best that I can but at the same time I am also having other project coming in. All the projects are urgent and i mean it's super urgent. I have agreements to do, proposals to do, and also meeting clients at the same time and all I can do is to give my best shot and the balance of my worries, I guess I have to wrapped it in a pelican pouch and pass it back to Allah and let Allah handles them. I am only His humble servant.
I don't have the team to be working in a team. As I said before in my previous journal, 90% of the staff have been assigned to handle another project and that leaves me all alone to handle this big project. To make things more interesting Allah is at the same time, testing me with a teaspoon of salt and pepper. That is by giving me a situation to handle which is big.... my son is sick again and so is my daughter. On top of this my ex husband wants me to handles this all by myself.
When I look at my good friends like Zue, Azlan, Razak..how lucky they are. Happily married and loving couple. Maybe I will not get it here but who knows akhirat things are better for me. heheheh because at that time no one can hurt me anymore. Here, they keep on hurting me like life is gonna be forever for them la kan..lol.
Back to the point, basically at this moment I am worried as hell but at the same time I am feeling ok because I know this moment will pass somehow. The moment I get PO for this project I am gonna go for a break. Well I have this song that I really want to dedicate to myself:
Are you swimming up stream
in oceans of blue
Do you feel like your sinking?
Are you sick of the rain after all you've been through?
Well I know what you're thinking
When you can't take it
You can make it
Sometime soon I know you'll see

'cause when you're in your darkest hour
And all of the light just fades away
and When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of gray
Well hang on and be strong

We're taking each step one day at a time
You can't loose your spirit
Let live and let live forget and forgive
It's all how you see it
And just remember keep it together
Don't you know you're never alone

'cause when you're in your darkest hour
And all of the light just fades away
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of gray
Well hang on (whoa) and be strong

No you're not defeated
And soon you'll be smiling once again
Then you won't have to feel it
Let it go with the wind
Time passes us by
And know that you're allowed to cry

'cause when you're in your darkest hour
And all of the light just fades away
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of gray
Well hang on (whoa) and be strong
(hang on hang on) Be strong
Hold on and be strong

A True Friend

This journal is dedicated to all my close friends....lately close friend has unintentionally or intentionally hurt my feelings. And at times I am feeling kinda alone.
A true friend will be there for you through thick and thin – good times and bad. It isn't too difficult to be friends with someone when life is filled with happiness and peace. It is something altogether different to have a friend who shares in your sadness and stays beside you even when things aren't going well.When strong friendships exist, mutual caring is evident. Doing things for one another, without expecting to have something done in return, is a sign of genuine friendship. So is being thoughtful and listening to friends when they need to open up.
When a friend is going through troubled times, being there to encourage them, even if it's just being a shoulder to cry on or to simply listen, can make all the difference in the world. Even when things are going great, having someone recognize and appreciate your accomplishments can be just as important. With so much emphasis placed on success and accomplishment this in this day and age, having someone to witness your achievements can make even the minor victories meaningful.
Unfortunately, sometimes, loyalty can be tested. We've all had situations where someone we'd consider a true friend has let us down. Friends, even true friends, are still human and because they're human they can make mistakes. Forgiveness is essential in friendships. Accepting a friend even though they may make a mistake shows them that you respect them enough to realize they're human.
No one is perfect. Have you always lived up to your highest potential? Sometimes, we can be the cause of problems that create negative effects for people who were counting on us. Because of this, friendships can be tested. A true friend accepts you, faults and all, though. A genuine friend understands that you make mistakes.
There are many reasons that you might decide someone is a good friend, and there are lots of reasons that you might want to pursue a closer friendship with someone. The color of friendship isn’t about race, ethnicity or skin color. It’s about two people who care about each other just as they are. Great friendships are formed when people will be there for each other, no matter what happens.
Friends become good friends because of these things, and because they enjoy spending time with each other. Friends don't become friends just because they look like each other, and people should never deny a friendship simply because they look different from each other. The true color of friendship shouldn’t be a color at all, but a feeling of belonging.
You can tell your true friends when they come to you for advice. If your friend is in need, they will often give you a call for helpful advice or simply to have a shoulder to cry on. Because that friend comes to you when they need help, it shows you that they think you are the person to help them. This is the ideal example of a true friend and something you should always keep in mind when a friend needs help.
The last reason why a friend who needs help is a friend indeed is that they will be there for you for both the laughter and the tears. Not only should two friends come together for fun times but also times of trouble. When you have a friend, make sure that the person whom you befriend is not a fair-weather friend and will stick by you no matter what. When the party is over, you want to be sure that your friend is still around. Although it is easier in the good times for many, it is when the rough times come along and you need help that you truly know who your friends are.

Drifting Apart

I thought that I knew you
But now I'm not sure

You used to be friendly
But not anymore

Each day we grow farther
Apart and I'm sad

We used to be best friends
The best I ever had.

At some point things changed
And our lives split apart

I miss you so much
In my life – In my heart.

Sometimes things must happen
And friends drift away

I wish it weren't us
I wish not this way.