BEING SINGLE,ALONE AND LOVING IT

I just realise that being single and on your own isnt bad at all. I was driving back after work at 5 in the morning, all alone on the road not many cars at this hour, suddenly the thought of "Glad that I'm single and alone" just make me feel good.I dont have to explain to anyone why i had to work so late and i don't have anyone waiting for me at home with their long face.Not after i have a long hard day at work.
Even if you find the perfect person that makes you happier, if you aren’t with yourself, it won’t work.
So, first at all, you have to relize what really is important to you, what really makes you feel better, and try to be the most satisfy as you can doing things for yourself… How? It depends only of you.
Consequently, you alredy will be happy alone (the idea “me, myself and I”), and probably you won’t need someone to be in that way, but then, suddenly a good person will enter in your life (or this person is alredy there and you couldn’t see him), and make you happier that you are, will complete you more than you could imagine…
You know, both will share good things, and will be the best thing!
But you also can realize that when you are alone but happy, is so much better than be with someone and unhappy… So pay attention!
Another good thing! I really think that when you are happy alone, you won’t search for someone, you know? Like “Find/search”? Is not like that, things will happen naturally, by the time that you’ve never imagined and waited :D(i know that is the worst thing say: “You don’t have to wait ‘cause it's not worth… ” But is real!)Actually, there is wonderful text in portuguese that the key statement is: “Cuide do seu jardim, que as borboletas virão…”
That would be almost like : “Take care of your garden so that beautiful butterflies will apper there…”The point is: You won’t need to search, if you’re in a ‘good mood’, good things will come to you… ;D Some singles are perfectly happy being just that: happily single.Unfortunately, society puts so much pressure on singles - especially women - to be in relationships that people forget that they have to be happy with themselves in order to be happy with someone else. That applies to friendships as well as intimate relationships.
Happy singles:
• Aren't obsessed with having kids or being married.
• Don't receive many phone calls after 9 p.m. They end their day in peace and quiet, not on the phone having a conversation with a dramatic friend.
• Are health conscious, believing exercise and a healthy diet give them balance and boost self-esteem.
• Love themselves and take full responsibility for their bad choices.
• Never compromise their standards.
• Are not content with what they accomplished yesterday but are always looking forward to what's next.
• Live life to the fullest, treating strangers with kindness, are optimistic about everything and have a zest for life.
• Don't define themselves by how much money they earn or their level of education.
• Understand the difference between being religious and being spiritual.
• Associate with other happy and positive people.
• They have mastered the art of being alone.
• They look forward to spending Friday night curled up with a good book or just watching movie marathon.
• When you call, they don't answer because the phone has been unplugged.

Does true Love really Exist?(Paul Always tell me it does)

Oh love certainly does exist and right now you are , whether you know it or not, traveling on the road towards it. All these life experiences that you are having along the way, will be of such benefit when you do get to the point of the road, where love is just there, waiting for you. Why do you have to go through bumps in the road, in order to get to the one who loves you and you love in return? Very good question (if I do say so myself LOL......kekekekekkek)
Well, I am a believer that the bumps make you stronger, help you to get to know yourself better, so that when you reach that point in the road, where that special one has reached that same point, at that same time, you will be able to give, receive and know what true love actually is. You will know yourself so well, and be able to give of who you truly are.
Right now, this may all be mubo jumbo for you, and that's okay. Just don't be discouraged, and it's okay to have your guard up a bit, and your eyes open, and your heart reserved for only that special someone. Nothing wrong with that. This is your growing time. This is your time, to go out there and explore, learn and by goodness, have fun! So smile, not only have you had the most memorable first kiss I have ever heard about, you are at a fantastic point in your life, where all you have to do, is be open to learning and experiencing. Go forth and enjoy!!!

When we are young and the world is new to us we discover feelings for the first time and they are so strong and powerful we can hardly stand it. But then LIFE shows us what reality is about and we start to pay closer attention to the things around us and are not so overwhelmed by it all and learn how to cope with people, places, and things on a level as to protect ourselves some what. We go thru many trials and tribulations and thrills, and chills, along the way until one day we are awakened by one of those really clear realities that we love someone and are loved the same way in return. That's when the whole damn world changes and you could care less about anything except what you and yours are doing. How do you know your in love????? When you wake up 30 years and a few kids and gran-kids later and tell your still there, but somewhat gray headed partner, I LOVE YOU, STILL!!!

SPECIALLY DEDICATED TO CINTA & ASMARA

People today, in all this new world technology and thinking, have lost sight of what a true friendship is. So, in sprit of my best friend Cinta & Asmara, I thought I would help the world out a little and explain what real, true friends are.

1. Friends don't have to be exactly the same. Friends have similarities but they also have their differences. They key to opening up the world of friendship is not only to expand on similarities but to accept each other's faults. Because you can't ever judge your friend.

2. Friends have to argue! No one likes to but it is necessary to be healthy. Cause if you agree on everything, either the government has expanded cloning subjects or someone isn't being true and is trying a little too hard.

3. You have to be comfortable together or else you just aren't going to click. If you feel edgy around the person then something isn't quite right.

4. Friends love unconditionally. They have there little angry moments but what's done is done and all is forgive and forget. Why let something that happened in the past ruin what happiness you could have in the future?

5. Believe in love at first sight because there is the equivalent in friendship. Some people think that you have to know someone really well to become good friends. Trust me, it's not true. If the first time you really spend time together you talk for 25 hours straight until 4:30 in the morning about some topic you thought no one else in the world understood, hun, that's real love at first sight.
These are only a few of the basics. Just remember, friends are forever. But only if you keep it that way. Don't diss your buds, love them instead. And when they drive you nuts, love them that much more for being just a little bit different and maybe just a little bit quirky!

My Imaginary Coffee Shop-Dedicate to Nini & As

Today I'm working at my imaginary coffee shop. It's not just your usual coffee shop. It's special. It's were all of my friends gather to keep up with each other. The tables are made of wood-each one topped with a beautifully decorated table cloth-maybe white with lace edges or even crisp gingham blocks. It's spring outside, the sun is shining. There are fresh flowers on the tables. Book shelvesline the walls with books and coffee cups placed on them. There is a bbeautiful scene painted on the ceiling. The chairs are comfy and very plush. There is a maroon sofa right inside the door. The front windows are lined with living plants. I don't just work here. I live here. This is where my mind goes when i want to be with my friends. It's happy here. Fresh and clean and i'm surrounded with living things. Every once in a while someone spills some 'milk'. But things always-always go back to normal. We all know we're loved and cared for. We all know that in our hearts we will never be alone. So please come and have a cup of coffee with me. I'm sure you'll love it here.The friendship will follow you always.

to my Best Friend, ALLAH

My heart cries out,for my love for You is so strong.For i know that from You i came,and unto You i belong.Like a moth to a flame,i am stuck to Islam. With so many people around the world,I share this powerful bond.We are LOVERS of Allah and of his Messegers and of his blessed sheiks.We have been martyed by the sword of affection,and now we swim in lovers lake.How lucky we are,to have fallen in love with you.This is the only love that will last for ever,the only love that will remain true.You are our one true hearts desire.It is a blessing for us to burn in this noori, divine fire.
My Allah,we stay alive knowing that you are near.We only desire to be with you,if death is the only way.Let it come,of it we have no fear.Our hearts cry out,for our love for You is so strong.For we know that from You we have come, and unto You we belong

Love & Marriage

A student asks a teacher, "What is love?"
The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back.But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."The student went to the field, go thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later.Then he saw another bigger one... But may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he start to realize that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he know he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand.The teacher told him, "...this is love... You keep looking for a better one, but when later you realise, you have already miss the person....""What is marriage then?" the student asked.The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he has picked one medium corn that he feel satisfy, and come back to the teacher.The teacher told him, "this time you bring back a corn.... You look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get.... This is marriage."

BETRAYAL FROM SOMEONE U LOVE

The worst type of betrayal is disloyalty from someone you love. Without doubt, being let down by those you trust most can hurt the most. This most commonly occurs when a person discovers their partner has been cheating on them. The feeling this invokes tends to be along the lines of heart-wrenching agony. It has been likened to feeling like your heart has been ripped out of your chest and torn apart, being in so much pain and suffering that you can't breathe or even just leaving you with an empty nothingness inside. Other emotions also rise to the surface, embarrassment and the dread that comes with the question; “Am I the last to know?”

When an affair rocks a relationship it can be very hard to overcome. Even the ones who try to patch up their relationship can find themselves in a constant rerun every time they have an argument where everything from the past is once again brought up and rehashed. There is only so much of this that anyone can take. The majority of people cannot get past an affair no matter what they do, hyper-vigilance of the other person's actions and whereabouts can get quite tiring and the wondering if it will happen again gets tedious while the perpetrator of the affair can find themselves feeling suffocated and even hide innocent things for fear that it will make their partner jealous or suspicious. This is always a mistake.

It is possible to mend the relationship however both parties must seriously want it to happen and make a huge effort at repairing the trust and love between them. To the person who has been cheated on but feels that their relationship is worth another chance I say this - draw the lines now. Make it very clear what will be tolerated by you in the future. In this way, if you do discover anymore circumstances where your trust has been betrayed, they will have no excuses and no future chances because you have laid it on the line for them and they agreed at the time. If you let them away with it a second time then why would they even attempt to be faithful in future. If they have that little respect for your feelings then why waste time with them anyway. Some things are not worth saving after all. But remember that everyone has the potential to stray from the right path at times and we are only human, we all make mistakes but it's important to learn from our mistakes so if your partner can't see that then let them go. We can all manage to get by alone for a while. If you do break up then make it a clean one, it's the easiest in the long-run.

Greatest Story Ever Told Lyrics - Oliver James

Thank you for this moment
I've gotta say how beautiful you are
Of all the hopes and dreams I could have prayed for 
Here you are
If I could have one dance forever
I would take you by the hand
Tonight it's you and I together
I'm so glad I'm your man
And if I lived a thousand years 
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you 
that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know 
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
tonight
I don't hear the music
When I'm looking in your eyes
But I feel the rhythm of your body
Close to mine
It's the way we touch, it soothes me
It's the way we'll always be
your kiss your pretty smile
you know i'd die for 
oh baby
you're all i need
And if I lived a thousand years 
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you 
that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know 
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
just how much i really need you
did I tell you that I love you
tonight
tonight
And if I lived a thousand years 
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you 
that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know 
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
just how much I really need you

did I tell you that I love you tonight

My Experience Being Baulimic for 7 years

I started throwing up when i first join the airline working as a stewardess in 1989. I had never been any good at self-control or consistency, so I guess I wasn't destined to become anorexic. Bulimia for me was initially about how I looked and about weight control, but it turned into a monster that I couldn't escape from. I cared about my appearance; the first thing I thought after a binge was "you're going to gain weight." However, after a while, I didn't throw up after daily meals in fear of fat. Instead, I would purposely gorge myself until I couldn't eat any more. Sickened and bloated I would stumble to the bathroom, crying and feeling like the biggest failure. Gasping, I would ram my finger down my throat until most of my binge was gone. The binges became huge, uncontrollable episodes where I tortured myself. Bulimia would come and go, but even when I wasn't binging, it was always in the back of my mind.Eventually, I was diagnosed with depression. As I began therapy and medication, my bulimia subsided to a point where it didn't totally control my life. Now, at age 38, I don't binge as often, but sometimes I relapse into those periods where I know that I am full, but I keep eating, keep stuffing food into my body. I hear the comments from those around me: "how do you eat so much and stay so thin?" I want to scream that I am not thin - that I am bloated and can feel myself becoming grotesque and disgusting. I am not a survivor of bulimia yet; I am still a victim. I know that I have a long road ahead of me. But I refuse to let the bulimia win. I threw up again that night, half-afraid that my eyeballs were going to explode. But it was, by far, more important that I get rid of dinner. Of course by then, throwing up was the only way I knew how to deal with fear. . . And [the bulimia] is so very seductive. It is so reassuring, so all-consuming, so entertaining.At first.Midway through the food you remember and it's too late and you're still fucking hungry . . . but then you feel so unbelievably guilty and hideous that you HAVE TO THROW UP, and so you do . . .

No one can simply "get over" bulimia. Telling a bulimic to eat normally is like telling a victim of spousal abuse to just leave him or a victim of alcoholism to stop drinking: It's just not that easy and it sure as hell doesn't happen overnight.

Wanting to Trust But Falling Into Doubt

I really can't put these past few weeks into words. I don't even know what to make of them myself.
Here's my vague attempt to describe and make some sense of my life:
My inner world has been a bit of a roller coaster as of late. I've been wavering between doubt and trust for nearly everything lately and I have fallen to doubt. It's been a mixture of intense joy and sorrow, betrayal and loyalty, closeness and yet being so far away. I just can't put it into words because it's been highly contradictory.
I think that many of my struggles exist mainly within my mind and that I am making it a lot worse on myself than I have to and doubting people I shouldn't be doubting, though I shouldn't put my trust in those specifically involved in the gossip/betrayal.
But doubting those who care about me has caused more harm than good and I end up locking people out, or even worse, end up assuming those who treasure me are only pretending to do so. I sometimes struggle to trust my own perception and this happens more often when I'm feeling insecure. So I start questioning everything and wonder what's real and what's not, and just to be safe, I turn skeptical and read into every possible sign of disinterest or deception. Many of these doubts are completely unfounded and even insulting to the goodness of the ones I doubt.
This has been the main struggle in my inner world and I'm intensely aware of this and the power it holds against me. And the truth is that the root of all this is doubt in myself and so I struggle to trust the world around me. I'm usually way more optimistic, trusting and open and I'd prefer to be that way but I'm in one of my funks.
In my outer world, I discovered that 4so called friends have been pretending to like me all this time and have been gossiping about me behind my back. At one time, these friends were semi close and I shared some of my personal secrets with one of them when I thought we were close. I became more distant from this friend before I was aware of the betrayal because he seemed gossipy and was talking smack about another friend I was close to and I felt quite uncomfortable around so much so much gossip and this friend was always flaking out on me too. I also moved on to greener pastures and found friends that were more worth my time. I became kind of distant with this older friend and then grew very distant once I found out he was only pretending to like me. A similar situation happened with the other friend, although there was less emotional investment in this one but I ended up moving away from both of them once I found out about the gossip and cruel comments. What bothered me most was the pretending and the deception and I feel gullible for trusting these people.
It was a little sad to lose them as friends but that wasn't nearly the hardest part because they may have not ever been real friends to begin with. But the deception fueled my insecurity and doubt and I started to wonder if their petty gossip had some truth in it and if others were merely pretending to like me. I want to be accepted (by everyone if possible) and I want to stay on everyone's good side as much as possible and ideally, I'd love to be accepted for being me and this whole situation feels like this huge rejection, despite the fact that I don't care much about the rejectees. I care about their approval though, just as I care about everyone's approval and that's part of the reason I'm struggling to let go.
The reality of the situation is that though I lost these 'friends' I am blessed with a handful of people who I love and who care about me. I am coming to realize that these special people are the real assets in my life. There is one friend who I care about deeply in particular (but there's a few others as well) and even if I lost all social approval and if everyone else really was pretending to like me, I'd still be blessed with these friendships and bonds. This is really what makes life worth living and it's far more important that social approval or being universally liked/accepted.
The prospect of losing these real friends (as opposed to the fake ones) would be devastating. And I am still blessed because those who I care about are close and still in my life and they have proved themselves amazing and loyal in this difficult time. In my heart, I know this loss is not going to happen but when the doubt surfaces, I question EVERYTHING, including these close bonds, and entertaining that possibility is what's heartbreaking and what causes me great anxiety. This is where the doubt really hurts me I also dislike myself for doubting and I'm fighting the doubt as best I can, though I still slip into it. I'm keeping my head above water because I know reality is hopeful in the most important regards and I have those I truly value in my life.

KERANA SATU KLIK, MALAPETAKA DITERIMA SEHINGGA KIAMAT

Abu Hurairah r.a. berkata: Rasulullah s.a.w. bersabda: "Sesiapa yang mengajak kejalan hidayat, maka baginya dari pahala seperti pahala (sebanyak pahala)pengikutnya, dengan tidak mengurangi sedikit pun dari pahala mereka. Dan sesiapa yang mengajak ke jalan sesat, maka menanggung dosa sebanyak dosa-dosa pengikutnya, dengan tidak mengurangi dari dosa-dosa mereka sedikit pun.

(Diriwayatkan oleh Imam Muslim)

Bagi memudahkan kefahaman akan maksud hadis-hadis di atas dan berkaitan dengan konteks kehidupan kita pada zaman ICT ini, mari kita ambil iktibar dari kisah berikut. Zack baharu tamat belajar di sebuah universiti kemudian di terima bekerja di sebuah syarikat ICT. Setiap pekerja dibekalkan dengan komputer, alamat email dan internet akses bagi memudahkan urusan kerja seharian.Zack mempunyai ramai kawan dan mereka berhubung melalui email setiap hari. Masa lapang Zack diisi dengan melayari laman web lucah. Kegemarannya ialah memuat turun (download) gambar-gambar lucah itu kemudian berkongsi dengan kawan-kawannya melalui email. Dia mempunyai "email group" dan ada 50 alamat email kawan-kawannya di dalam "emailgroup" tersebut.
Sekali menghantar email, dia akan menghantar kepada "emailgroup" tersebut.Selain daripada itu dia juga suka menghantar semula email yang diterima daripada rakan yang lain ke "emailgroup" . Di antara kandungan email itu adalah kisah-kisah yang mengaibkan seseorang seperti video klip bercium di dalam lif, kisah seluar dalam yang dijumpai di dalam periuk di restoran mamak dan seumpamanya lagi yang kebanyakannya adalah perkara-perkara yang nafsu kita seronok membacanya dan melihatnya tetapi hukumnya adalah jelas haram di sisi syariat Islam.Pada suatu hari ketika pulang dari tempat kerja Zack terlibat dengan kemalangan jalan raya dan kembali kerahmatullah di tempat kejadian.Di dalam Islam telah sepakat ulama' bahawa hukum melihat gambar-gambar lucah, menyebarkan fitnah, membuka aib dan seumpamanya adalah haram serta berdosa kepada mereka yang melakukannya dan menyebarkannya. Untuk memudahkan kefahaman, katakan Zack telah mendapat satu dosa kerana menghantar gambar-gambar lucah kepada kawan-kawannya. Gambar tersebut diterima oleh 50 orang kawan-kawannya melalui email. Kesemua kawan-kawannya seronok dengan gambar tersebut dan meredai perbuatan Zack maka setiap kawannya mendapat satu dosa manakala dosa setiap kawannya itu juga diberikan kepada Zack jadilah sekarang dosa Zack 1+50 = 51.Setiap kawan-kawan Zack itu pula menghantar gambar tersebut kepada 10 orang lagi,maka sekarang dosa Zack akan bertambah lagi menjadi 1+50+500=551 dosa. Kemudian setiap sepuluh orang itu menghantar lagi kepada 10 orang yang lain, bertambahlah dosa Zack menjadi 1+50+500=5551. Begitulah seterusnya.Zack telah meninggal dunia, email nya masih lagi tersebar, maka akan berterusanlah dia mendapat dosa selagi email itu berlegar di ruang cyber hingga hari kiamat. Begitulah iktibar yang boleh diambil daripada apa yang berlaku kepada Qabil, setiap jiwa yang mati dibunuh kerana hasad dengki manusia, maka dosa membunuh itu akan juga sampai kepada Qabil hingga hari kiamat. Bayangkanlah berapa ramaikah jiwa yang telahkena bunuh dengan zalim sejak dari zaman nabi Adam hingga sekarang? Dan berapakah dosa yang terpaksa ditanggung oleh Qabil di akhirat kelak?
Berbalik kepada kisah Zack, katakan sebelum meninggal dunia, Zack telah sempat bertaubat, insya'Allah dosa manusia terus dengan Allah, seperti meninggalkan puasa, zakat dan solat fardu akan Allah ampunkan tetapi dosa kita sesama manusia hanya Allah akan ampunkan bila insan tersebut mengampunkan kita. Zack telah menyebarkan perkarayang menyebabkan orang lain berdosa, bagaimanakah dia nak mintak ampun dengan semua yang menerima email tersebut? Selagi mereka semua tidak mengampunkan Zack maka selagi itulah dia akan terima dosa hingga kiamat kelak.
Inilah malapetaka yang sangat besar pada zaman ICT ini. Dengan sekali klik sahaja saham dosa akan mencurah-curah sampai kepada kita. Sebab itu setiap kali apabila kita menerima email, hendaklah berhati-hati, jika kandungan email itu adalah gambar lucah atau yang mengaibkan seseorang muslim lain atau sesuatu fitnah hendaklah segera dibuang dan jangan ada sedetik pun didalam hati untuk seronok dengan benda yang haram bagi mengelakkan kita dan pengirim dari berdosa.