Thursday, October 22, 2009

Critism Cant Hurt You

I just have to write this topic today for the benefit of MYSELF and those who care to better themselves . Some of the stories in this journal like about Abraham Lincoln and Eleanor Roosevelt are taken from the books i have read. Reading and understanding always make you a better person. In surah Al'-Alaq started with the word "READ". But reading and not understanding will only create problems.
At one time, criticism made by others, really bothered me right to the root of my heart. But then I remember Umar Khattab once said, the best person to make you a better person is your closest enemy. The criticism given by your closest enemy actually makes you a better person..and while they are busy finding ways to hurt you with their critics and words, you will be busy bettering your self. For that I will have to say THANK YOU.
Off late, I have been berated and insulted, and denounced as mentally ill bitch, pig etc etc....I have been called every possible combination of unprintable cuss words in Bahasa Malaysia language. Bother me? Huh! When I hear somebody cussing me now, I never turn my head to see who is talking." Most of us take the little jibes and javelins that are hurled at us far too seriously.
If I am lied about, ridiculed, double-crossed, knifed in the back, and sold down the river by one out of every six of my most intimate friends- let's not indulge in an orgy or self pity. Instead, lets remind ourselves that's precisely happen to one of the prophet...Nabi Isa(pbuh) and also Prophet Muhamad s.a.w(pbuh). So why should I expect a better score?
I discovered lately that although I couldnt keep people from crtisizing me unjustly, I could do something infinitely important: I COULD DETERMINED WHETHER I WOULD LET THE UNJUST CONDEMNATION DISTURB ME. I am not advocating ignoring all criticism la kan. Far from it. I am just talking about ignoring UNJUST CRITICISM.
Ok this part is taken from a book I read once. About Eleanor Roosevelt and how she handled unjust criticism.(ni ada kang someone kata I am mentally ill lagi..hehehe) And only Allah knows how she had a lot of unjust criticism. She probably had more ardent friends and more violent enemies than any other woman who ever lived in the white house. When she was young, she was morbidly shy, afraid of what people might say. She was sooo afraid of criticism that one day she asked her aunt....Theodore Roosevelt's sister for advice. She said something like " Auntie Bye, I want to do so and so. But I am afraid of being criticized".
Teddy Roosevelt's sister looked into the eye and said "NEVER BE BOTHERED BY WHAT PEOPLE SAY, AS LONG AS YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART YOU ARE RIGHT"..the advice bit of advice provoke to be her Rock Of Gibraltar years later.
The only way we can avoid criticism is to be like a Dresden-chine figure and stay on the shelf. " Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. yOU'LL be 'Damned if you do' and damned if you don't"
Abraham Lincoln might have broken under the strain of the Civil war if he hadn't learned the folly of trying to answer to all the vitriolic condemnations hurled at him, He description of how he handled his critics has become a literary gem...his headquarters desk during the war and Winston Churchill had a framed copy of it on his walls of his study...(I like this very much) It goes like this " If I were try to read, much less to answer, all the attacks made on me, this shop might as well be closed for any other business. I do the very best I know how....the very best I can and I mean to keep on doing so until the end. If the end brings me out all right, then what is said against me WONT MATTER. If the end brings me out wrong, then 10 angels swearing I was right would make so difference.

Remember this quote :
DO THE BEST YOU CAN; AND PUT UP YOUR OLD UMBRELLA AND KEEP THE RAIN OF CRITICISM FROM RUNNING DOWN THE BACK OF YOUR NECK

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